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Recent Movie Reviews


Revenge of the Kongs Revenge of the Kongs

Rated 1.5 / 5 stars

What the hell did I just witness?

God, I'm so tired of sprite movies where stuff happens to characters that would never happen in the series. And this one really takes the cake. First of all, you're obviously trying for the same dramatic story that Rise Of The Mushroom Kingdom used, and that wasn't that great of a movie to begin with. Main character gets killed, sidekicks seek revenge, and half of them get killed in the process. How original! You also have no sense of timing. Almost every scene was dragged out far too long, and to be honest, it made the entire movie very boring and a pain to watch. There was barely even a full plot here. It started out decent as far as a storyline goes, but then people just start fighting and dying, and there wasn't even an ending. Nothing was resolved. Even if there's supposed to be a sequel to something, there's still some kind of resolution or implication to what happens next. This lacked almost every basic structure of storytelling, not to mention the cloaked person had no reason to be there, except to mindlessly kill two of the characters. He had no other major effect and it was easy to tell you had no idea what to do with him. And if I may make another point, the vocal work was utterly terrible. Horrendous, if I may. All of it was whispered. It was quite apparent you were trying to do it without your parents hearing you or something to that effect. If it weren't for the theatrical music, I'd give sound a flat zero. Overall, this movie had absolutely nothing right with it. Not a single thing. It doesn't fit the Donkey Kong universe at all, and it's just such a played out story. The only reason some people like this is because they're fans of the characters and are too afraid to pull their heads out of their asses and look at the actual production values.

I gotta stop watching sprite movies, they just make me sick.



Sprite Diapers Sprite Diapers

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

A thinking human on Newgrounds!

Finally. This needed to be done. I loved it, it's just a perfect satire of all sprite movies submitted here to NG, or anywhere on the web really. They take no effort and yet they're some of the most popular movies out there. No one's original anymore, and it's sad. The fact that this is rated as less than a 3 amazes me further. That shows that very few people out there actually get this. Sad, really. Either way, I support you and this movie. Nice work.


Blordow responds:

i am so smat i am so smat

s.m.a.t i mean s.m.a.r.t

doh

cool man

eat my shorts

doh


World 2-4 Retaliation World 2-4 Retaliation

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

Sprite movies should not be rated this high

It was okay. The entire fight was excellent and well choreographed, but I'm just so tired of sprites. Can no one actually draw Mario? They're just so overused and an excuse to animate without having to draw. Also, why are there so many movies that use the original SMB sprites, but Luigi is brown and white instead of green and white? It's like the people never played the original game but remember seeing screenshots of him with white. And what is with all the drama in Mario flashes? It seems like someone dies in every one nowadays. Whatever. Don't get me wrong, it was a good movie and the plot was overall a very interesting one. But sprites are for games.


Recent Game Reviews


Four Second Frenzy Four Second Frenzy

Rated 4 / 5 stars

Some good, some not

Some of the games are incredibly confusing. I found myself not knowing what to do or what I should be looking at for most of the games. Or I would figure it out when it was too late. Some were good though, nice and simple, true to the Wario Ware style. But yeah, some games need better explanations or just need to be less confusing. I guess that's expected with a collab though.



Ultimate Mario Quiz v.2 Ultimate Mario Quiz v.2

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

Not all that hard

I actually didn't think this was all too hard. Maybe because I have no life I was able to go through every question almost instantly. But it was pretty cool nonetheless, and it could be challenging for some poeple out there.



Super Mario Flash(Game) Super Mario Flash(Game)

Rated 3 / 5 stars

Eh...it was okay.

I dunno. The game wasn't by any means bad, it just didn't really get to me. It was a regular Mario-style game, and it was fairly easy. The sound was annoying, especially when Mario walks. The ranking system is very cool though, points for that. But like I said, it's not a bad game, but I'm not going to be playing that all too often.